“The thought manifests as the word;
the word manifests as the deed;
the deed develops into habit;
and habit hardens into character.”
Those words, written by Siddhartha Gautama (Buddha) thousands of years ago, are no less profound today. They make us stop to assess what we are doing with our thoughts, our words (what we say to ourselves and others), our focus and actions (what we focus on expands), our patterns (which become habits), and how it all how molds our character — which determines our destiny. What we choose to think and say has a deep effect on what we do, and what we do equally effects who we become.
How can you take the above quote and use it to apply it in your life? By becoming a mindful observer, and becoming aware of where you tend to direct your thoughts what you tend to say to yourself – that is, your habitual thought and language patterns which direct your focus, and thus, your results. Are they empowering or disempowering? Do you use words that positively influence the way you think about yourself and how others perceive you to be?
Here are a few tips on words/language patterns that may be manifesting negative impact in your life, with suggestions to help you turn that negative into a positive:
Try: Pay attention to what you mean when you use this word, as it often means that you are unsure or not committed. To minimize disappointment for yourself, simply replace “I’ll try” with “I will”. For example, instead of saying “I’ll try to bring in five new clients next month”, say “I will bring in five new clients next month”. (Notice how different it feels for you when you replace “try” with “I will” out loud.)
No Problem: This phrase has two negatives – no and problem. It suggests that it could be a problem, but it’s not. By changing this phrase to “my pleasure” you will have a more positive impact on yourself and others.
Why: When challenged or frustrated, starting a question with “why” will most likely take you to a negative place; ie: Why can’t I bring in new clients?; Why am I so stuck?; Why can’t I get out of this situation? It tends to acknowledge that the situation is solid and tangible. Remember, the mind is a very powerful tool; you direct your mind and thoughts by the questions you ask yourself. When you ask yourself more positive questions, you’ll realize more positive answers. So instead of “why,” replace the word with more empowering and compelling questions beginning with “What” or “How”: “What can I do today to generate new clients? How can I bring in new clients? What else can I do to generate income today by bringing in new clients?
Pay attention to your thoughts and how you are directing those thoughts with the words/phrases/questions you use. If you want more empowering results, notice and choose differently. You have options, and the choice is yours.
Karen PfefferKaren is passionate about sharing powerful programs on communication, empowerment, team building and transformation. With a father from Kansas and a mother from Puerto Rico, Karen has a unique cultural mix that has inspired her to challenge stereotypes and “push the envelope” at every opportunity. She co-founded Fire Power Seminars with Connie Phelan in 2006 to empower individuals, organizations, and companies to achieve more than they ever thought possible.